How to stop being a door mat in your relationships and become supremely assertive
By Felicity Muscat
Did you know that many people make themselves door mats because they believe deep down that they will be rewarded for doing so? Did you know that there is no “reward” for this self-destructive strategy besides a downward emotional and physical spiral?
Did you know that this tendency to submit oneself as the punching bag of others is caused by conditioned programming laid down in early life through negative events such as abuse, neglect, humiliation, abandonment, criticism, judgement, etc. that is stored within as memories? Did you know that those negative memories behave like an invisible puppet master feeding you misinformation about who you are, what you are worth, and affects how you choose “not” to live your life?
Finally, did you know that it is possible to completely rid yourself of this self-destructive program once and for all and take back the helm of your life? How does one do that, you ask?
In order to move to a place of empowerment, the first step is that you must admit to yourself that this self-destructive tendency is simply that – and that it is your heart’s desire to renounce it. So if you feel you are ready to do that, try this; place one hand over your heart and as if you are speaking from your heart region, simply say the following:
“I realise that this tendency to make myself a door mat is destructive to me and my life and I whole heartedly wish to have it purged from my mind, body and life so that I can reclaim my rightful ownership and control over all of it.”
Now take a moment and notice how you feel inside. At this point you may have one or both of the following experiences:
- Many feel some or all of the following in the heart region; a feeling of lightness, peace, joy, relief, strength, stillness, ability to breathe, resilience, clarity and so on. If you feel any of this and you like the experience simply affirm that to yourself and it will grow stronger.
- Some of you will also become aware of some internal resistance to the above statement which may be experienced as a negative voice from within the mind, fear, worry, anxiety, blockages, pains etc. If you notice any of this simply affirm your awareness of it via your heart and it will begin to diminish somewhat. Next, if you wish, simply affirm that you do not like this resistance living within you and you would like it purged from your mind and body forever and it should ease further.
Having done this you will likely have a greater degree of inner strength and clarity about your situation; meaning that now you will be more open to what is to be said. That resistance is what I call the videotape of your so called life history, stored in your unconscious mind/body which you have identified yourself with. Much of it consists of negative memories that limit and control you.
This same life history has depleted and exiled your Life Force Energy (i.e. Your true self) from your body and has left it in a weakened and vulnerable state. In other words, you have not been fully in your body all this time. The positive feelings above that I have helped you rekindle is a partial experience of your Life Force Energy returning to your mind and body. As you can see this is an inherently empowering experience. This is also what it means to be alive, living the way you intended to, and fully in charge of your life.
In order to solidify your footing in your mind/body it becomes imperative that all the old negative memories of the past be completely erased from within. There is now a new coaching process that does this rapidly, effortlessly, permanently and completely.
To learn more about this, contact me via the link below where you can request a free introductory phone/Skype coaching consultation to help you reclaim your life and your self-esteem.
Felicity Muscat is the Founder of The Institute of Self Mastery which was created to help others fulfil the truest, highest, and most authentic expression of themselves in all areas of life.
If you have tried other approaches that have failed and are ready for change, request a complimentary introductory phone/Skype coaching consultation to help you get started on your journey back to your peak performing empowered and alive self today. To learn more and explore others’ success stories, download Felicity’s eBooks.
Felicity Muscat, former psychologist is now an international self-esteem, self-empowerment, and self-mastery life coach. Felicity is also a relationship and success coach, author of three best-selling books and Level 3 mind resonance coach.
Click here to request your Free 1 Hour Introductory MRP Telephone/Skype Coaching Consultation